Buddy's #4 Great by Choice by Jim Collins

Great by Choice was a great choice for my first business book of the year. I really have enjoyed Jim Collins books, the perennial best seller Good to Great and Built to Last have influenced much of my thinking in regards to leadership and business. If you are planning on leading others there is much food for thought in Great by Choice.

One of their findings that meshed with Good to Great was the other side of a Level 5 leader. The Level five leader is someone who blends extreme personal humility with intense professional will. In Great by Choice they highlighted the idea of intense professional will, that they had the discipline to stick to what was working and the paranoia to change if they needed to. At the same time they did not change without empirical data to tell that that was the right thing to do.

The study was done of companies that beat the average in their market by 10X earnings based on stock market prices.

Fanatic discipline: 10Xers display extreme consistency of action-consistency with values, goals, performance standards, and methods. They are utterly relentless, monomaniacal, unbending in their focus on their quests.

he signature of mediocrity is not an unwillingness to change; the signature of mediocrity is chronic inconsistency

Some of their more intriguing findings are that the very best companies actually take less risks than their average counterparts. They take calculated risks based on empirical data and are not swayed by others.

The old adage says it is better to be lucky than good. Collins and his team have found that while that may be true it is far better to be great than lucky. When you are great you are able to take the good and bad events and turn them into positive things for your company.

Leaders are often expected to meet huge challenges and our heroes are often people that are able to bring about positive change, I think F. Scott Fitzgerald would agree.

One should...be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise.” -F. Scott Fitzgerald

The Joy of Books

Ron’s #1: How to Write a Sentence by Stanley Fish

Beginning this new year of reading a book a week, I thought a book on reading seemed appropriate. The full title of this book is How to Write a Sentence and How to Read One. I think the simplicity of it is genius, and it sounded compelling enough to read.

The book recounts a story where a writer was asked by a student if he could be a writer. The writer asked, “Well, do you like sentences?” This is akin to a painter liking the smell of paint. We often overlook the simplicity of a sentence for the grandeur goal of a novel or screenplay, but forget the beauty of sentences.

This book is part academic, part of the joy of writing, and part teaching writing, although I’m not sure of the exact divisions. Fish collects and analyzes dozens of famous and not-so-famous sentences to show how and why they work so well. As an English teacher, I loved most of what this book had to offer. I wrote many of his exercises for me to replicate in the classroom.

My two favorite chapters are the ones of first sentences and on last sentences. Fish shows how those excellent opening lines have an “angle of lean,” and they point to something about the story that is to come. I enjoyed hearing his thoughts on some famous opening lines. As for closing lines, there is a good deal on the last line of The Great Gatsby, one of my favorites to teach.

If you are an English teacher, you will enjoy this book. Or if you are a writer. If you like to read, you’d probably find something interesting. If you own more than two video game consoles, well, try something else.

Hear an interview with Stanley Fish on NPR

Mark's #2 - Life of Pi (A Novel) by Yann Martel

 Piscine Molitor Patel, known as "Pi" tells his life story and epic adventure as an adult looking back at both his childhood in Pondicherry, India, and his survival on a life boat in the Pacific Ocean for 227 days with a Bengal tiger.   As the son of a zookeeper and owner, Pi is forced to use all of his knowledge about animals (which is quite extensive) in order for him and his tiger to survive.

As a story of survival, Yann Martel, does a great job of writing and engaging the reader.   From this perspective, the story was thoroughly enjoyable.  However, toward the end, an already bizarre adventure took some even more bizarre and unbelievable twists... such as encountering yet another (at this time blind) castaway (a Frenchman) on the vast expanse of the Pacific Ocean.  Hours before what seemed the inevitable death for Pi, the Frenchman, and the tiger, both castaways decide to join in one lifeboat as 'brothers' in their death.  Yet, the Frenchman decides instead to try to murder Pi and eat him, but first he is eaten by the Tiger instead.

The other plot twist toward the end, which still leaves me scratching my head, was when Pi and the tiger land on a floating island of algae, trees, and docile meerkats... here Pi is able to eat his fill of juicy algae, drink from freshwater ponds, and eat fish who apparently swim in from the ocean and die... Oh, by the way, as it turns out, the Island also consumes humans at night??? So, inspite of some weeks of luxury and comfort, Pi decides to take his tiger and once again head out to sea.  It was at this point, though late in the book, that I began to realize that much more of the story had to do with metaphor and allegory than I had previously taken it.  Perhaps, or more likely, probably this whole scene has some sort of metaphysical and religious symbolism that I can't quite place.

Speaking of religious things, Pi is a very religious boy.  Here is where the author was clearly trying to put forth a worldview for his readers to embrace.  Pi is what theologians would call a religious pluralist or syncretist.  As an Indian boy, he grew up for a love of all things Hindu.  During one family vacation, he stumbles into a Roman Catholic church, and subsequently becomes a Chrsitian (I use the term loosely here).  It's not that he rejects Hinduism, but rather he adds Christianity.  Later he does the same with Islam, and in his mind there is no contradiction.  In fact, this seems to be what the author would have the reader himself do... don't worry about the nature of truth or the law of contradiction... that, in his mind, is besides the point.  One can worship the god of Islam which fiercely claims that there is only one God, and at the same time worship the multitudes of gods and goddesses within the Hindu pantheon.

While this view of reality certainly will appeal to the postmodern mind, it turns out to be both philosophically untenable, and also religiously ignorant and offensive to those who hold dearly to each one of the faiths Pi embraces.  How can Pi embrace the Bible and ignore the first commandment - "You shall have no other gods before me"?  How can Pi be a devout follower of Islam and yet burn incense to the god Vishnu?  How can Pi embrace the pantheism of Hinduism AND the transcendent God of both Islam and Christianity? How can Pi acknowledge pain and suffering from the perspective of both a Hindu (it is an illusion) and Christian (it is very real, and God's own Son suffered under it)?  Simply put, he can't do this.   The syncretistic, postmodern view of ultimate reality that Yann Martel puts fourth may make for an element to a good story, but as a philosophy it is a shoddy bucket that can't hold water.

Conclusion: Enjoy the story, but don't turn your brain off to the philosophical implications of Martel's worldview.

Ally's #5: The Family of Adoption by Joyce Maguire Pavao

I had an intense evening last night with this book and a glass of merlot. Like my Tina Fey book, I also read this in one sitting, but for very different reasons. Jim and I have known we wanted to adopt since our second date and have been talking about starting our family for the past year or so. My mind has been eager to learn more about parenting and the adoption process, and this book had me absolutely engrossed.

The author, Joyce Pavao, is herself adopted, and is the founder of the Pre/post Adoption Consulting Team, the Family Connections Training Institute, and Center for Family Connections in Boston and New York City. To say that she is a wealth of knowledge is an understatement. The book is fairly short (118 pages + epilogue and glossary), but it answered a lot of questions I had and some I didn't realize I needed to be asking.

The book is divided into six sections. First, Pavao addresses the rites of the birth parent(s). I'm actually just now seeing that she is emphasizing the "rites" and not the "rights." In this chapter, she does not simply address legal standing, but the psychological struggles birth parents endure when choosing or being required to give up their children. Pavao uses stories blended together from her cases over the past 25 years to drive her point home intellectually and emotionally. Holy cow, was she successful! This chapter in particular helped me move past seeing the word "birth mom" as a label and to instead see a living, breathing person that is about to endure pain and loss that I cannot fathom. And that pain never goes away. This chapter gave me a whole host of ideas about how I can be praying for a birth mom.

The next chapter is about the parental rites of the adoptive parent. A lot of emphasis was given to couples who adopt and are dealing with infertility. It was difficult to identify with this because Jim and I aren't convinced that achieving pregnancy will be a problem for us, but I think Pavao did a great job of identifying the sense of loss that both the birth parents and adoptive parents have to deal with.

I also appreciated her encouragement to protect privacy, but to not be secretive. I've heard a lot of adoptive parents express regret and confusion over dumb questions extended family members and strangers ask about adopted children, sometimes in their presence. In this chapter, I realized that I shouldn't jump down people's throats for being idiots because I take offense to it as the parent. Instead, I need to be aware how uncomfortable it can make a child feel to have such a sensitive topic discussed in a public place with a perfect stranger as though they weren't present or couldn't understand the conversation. Note taken, Ms. Pavao.

The next four chapters discuss the particular needs adopted children have at various stages of development, as well as how to support and encourage their connections with their birth heritage. I learned a great deal in these sections about how begin talking to a child about his/her adoption, how to keep an eye out for normal developmental issues that are amplified in adopted children, and how to demonstrate respect for the birth mom and birth heritage so the child doesn't feel alienated. Pavao also includes some pretty heavy stories about reunions with birth parents. When you first read the details (ex. your birth mom is also your sister; you are the result of incest), you can't imagine how such a reunion could possibly go well, but as you read on, you realize that the truth, however horrible, is what adopted children are seeking.

Pavao is most definitely a proponent of open adoption. In the final chapter, she gives a summary of how adoption has transformed over the last two centuries in America (I really wished she would have put this at the beginning) and where she believes it should go. I could write more in praise of this book, but instead I'll leave you with a few quotes that speak for themselves.

Adoption is about finding families for children, not about finding children for families. (p.24)

Many of us were told that our birth parents were poor and unable to parent, so we gravitate toward a lower socioeconomic group of friends at certain periods, or we work with this population in order to give something back to 'our people.' We take what you say very seriously. If you put down what we know or imagine is our background in any way, it only adds to our loss of self-esteem. When you express love and respect for our culture, for our race, for our religion, our ethnicity of root family, as well as for what we've gained from our family by adoption, we hear you. (p. 90)

Even more than legal openness, I'm concerned about emotional openness in the family of adoption. I often see families with adolescents who are acting out in some way and parents who don't accept that they are all being affected by the issues that inevitably arise in an adoptive family. Although they may talk openly about adoption in general, they are rigid when they talk about it in terms of their own family. There's a sense of closedness which makes it difficult for the children to feel they can gain information about themselves without hurting their adoptive parents. These families are often committed to appearing as if they are a biologically related one. This is stressful and demeaning for the children, who know this is not true. (p. 109)

Ally's #4: Bossypants by Tina Fey

Growing up, my mom used to tell me I was bossy. You know what I told her? "I'm not bossy, I'm assertive!" Assertive has a more positive connotation, don't you think?

The title of this book appealed to my bossy side, and the fact that it was written by Tina Fey appealed to my sense of humor. I wasn't really sure what it was about when I checked it out from the library, because even the information on the cover was a joke.

Once in a generation a woman comes along who changes everything. Tina Fey is not that woman, but she met that woman once and acted weird around her.

I read the book in a single sitting. That is not a reflection of how amazing of a reader I am, but rather how meaningless the content was. Not to say that Tina Fey's life is meaningless--clearly she was put here on earth to give the best Sarah Palin impersonation ever.

The first 100 pages of the book are funny, often vulgar, anecdotes about Tina's childhood, adolescence, college days, first job, and marriage. Everything is a joke. Everything. Her writing only shows a hint of seriousness in the latter 150 pages, where she talks about her career and what its like to be a writer at SNL, to be a working mom, and to write/act on 30 Rock. The 25 pages in between these two sections are pure randomness. This is from her "Twelve Tenets of Looking Amazing Forever":

#4: Don't Be Afraid to Try "Outside the Box" Skin Care Solutions

I spent most of 1990 bargaining with God that I would take one gigantic lifelong back zit in exchange for clear skin on my face. While this never worked out, I do not at all regret the time I spent pursuing it. It's about the journey, people.

My favorite chapter of the book was about her dad, Don Fey. She approached it in a very lighthearted and sarcastic way, but it demonstrated a deep respect, appreciation for, and healthy fear of her father. It struck a chord with me because I, too, have a dad that I both loved and feared growing up. His name is Walt. Don't mess with Walt. He protects me ferociously and can yell like a grizzly bear.

My dad has visited me at work over the years, and I've noticed that powerful men react to him in a weird way. They 'stand down.' The first time Lorne Michaels met my dad, he said afterward, 'Your father is...impressive.' They meet Don Fey and it rearranges something in their brain about me. Alec Baldwin took a long look at him and gave him a firm handshake. 'This is your dad, huh?' What are they realizing? I wonder. That they'd better never mess with me, or Don Fey will yell at them? That I have high expectations for the men in my life because I have a strong father figure?

I think I would have enjoyed the second half of the book more if I was a person deeply interested in sketch comedy, writing, show biz, etc. It was cool to hear her perspective, but I found myself reading it all quietly, while the first half of the book had me laughing out loud on numerous occasions.

I appreciate Tina for her ability to tell a story in a hilarious way. Did the book make me laugh? Yes. Was I personally enriched by it? Probably not. Would I let a high-schooler read it? Absolutely not.

I will leave you with "The Rules of Improvisation That Will Change Your Life and Reduce Belly Fat":

The first rule of improvisation is AGREE. Always agree and SAY YES. The second rule of improvisation is not only to say yes, but YES, AND. You are supposed to agree and then add something of your own. The next rule is MAKE STATEMENTS. This is a positive way of saying 'Don't ask questions all the time.' THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, only opportunities. If I start a scene as what I think is very clearly a cop riding a bicycle, but you think I am a hamster in a hamster wheel, guess what? Now I'm a hamster in a hamster wheel.